Packing for the Hospital is Exactly Like Packing for China

Warning: This post contains a soap box rant on hospital bags that may or may not be completely irrational.

Also, I've never been to China.


So, we're still breach at 38 weeks (tomorrow). We went in last Monday morning for the inversion, and learned some more about the conditions in the womb. She is not frank breach. She is actually complete breach, which means feet down and head up. We decided that because of this and a few other factors, the risk was too high, and we didn't want to risk breaking our little baby's bones before she can be out here breaking them some fun way [like jumping off of a toilet]... <--True story from the life of yours truly, by the way.

So, we are waiting, hoping, and praying that she will decide to flip around on her own. I know she is perfectly capable of it because she is a crazy ninja baby. However, we do realize that sometimes there is a very good reason that a baby is breach. We ultimately want her to be happy and healthy, and we have accepted that a C section might be the very best way to give her that. Man, isn't prayer great?! It helps us do hard things and feel peace about things that used to make us want to throw in the towel.

So at Wednesday's doctor appointment, we'll decide if we want to schedule a C section for 39 or 40 weeks. There are pros and cons to both. 40 gives her more time to plump up and develop, and also more time to flip on her own. 39 is good too because if my water breaks while she is breach, there is a higher chance of a prolapsed cord, which is a very scary thought to me. [Warning: My knowledge on this subject is fairly limited. I'm not sure I want to know more about it right now though. Don't enlighten me.]

How I understand a prolapsed cord: The cord slips out when the water breaks and it can often mean you lose the baby. It's bad.

So, we're still deciding her potential Birthday. :) We'll keep you posted.


But, I feel like the experience of going to the hospital expecting to do an inversion had some major positives to it. One of the biggest to me is that we had a kind of trial run at packing a hospital bag. And I'm going to tell you something that may shock you.

Those "What to Pack" lists all over Pinterest are stupid.

I know, I know. Here you thought I was a nice pregnant lady who doesn't say things like stupid, but I've found that since I've been pregnant, I'm sort of very mean in my head.

I am a very organized person. I've been making a list of things I want to take to the hospital so I wouldn't forget anything [like a toothbrush] when it came time to go. BUT... I had a total breakdown on Sunday night because I thought of all of those lists I had looked at online and started panicking that I wasn't bringing the right things. [What if I NEED a CD player and 3 sets of extra batteries?!?]

Thank goodness for my sweet and patient husband. He sat me down and told me to show him the lists. He went through them one by one and asked if I felt like we needed each of the things on the lists that we didn't have packed. I ended up answering no to everything and stuck with my original list.

Those lists are... dumb... because:

1) They make it seem like people who pack things they didn't end up using are dumb and should probably be made fun of for not predicting exactly how their hospital experience would go and what they would and wouldn't want throughout it.

I never even touched my pink fuzzy socks. I was so stupid to bring them. I'll know better for my next child. I wouldn't suggest them for anyone. Ever. #wasteofspace

2) They make things that are completely and totally personal preference look like essentials. (If I was going on a trip to China, I wouldn't look up a bunch of random people's ideas of what to pack...)

If you don't bring your own toilet paper, you WILL die. The papery hospital paper will probably give you an infection and you'll never have kids again. #sterilizationforfree 

3) They hit vulnerable, hormonal, pregnant ladies with product placement that often makes them feel like they have to go out and buy fancy stuff that they wouldn't even use at home, let alone at the hospital. It's the whole, "If you have this one item, nothing else will matter, you won't feel any pain, and your birthing experience will be a breeze" phenomenon.

I don't know what I would have done without my triple strawberry milkshake banana berry delight body wash. It made my whole recovery go faster. Definitely an essential!! 

This filt-o-rama water bottle is mana from heaven! I don't go anywhere without it--especially the hospital. #iwaspaidformentioningthisbutitotallywouldhavementioneditanyways... 

4) But mostly.... They make it seem like you don't know what you want, but they, a complete stranger that lives across the country from you, obviously know exactly what you'll need.

You NEED to make exactly 3 playlists for different phases of labor and moods you may find yourself in. The baby will remember the music if you play it before they are born and practically walk out of the womb to get to it. #ihavetheperfectplaylistsatthelinkbelowbecausewehavethesametaste 


So, if you're pregnant and panicking about the hospital bag lists, my [probably just as unwanted] advice is that you remember that you are capable of packing for yourself. You've packed for all of the trips you've been on, even if you weren't sure exactly what to expect. If you want to pack 3 pairs of shoes, pack them! No one judged you when you packed them on your trip to China. And you don't have to pack an extra pillow if you're fine with the hospital ones.

Ok. Stepping down from the soapbox now. :)

Note: I wrote that little rant last week when I was in a horrendously sarcastic mood. Logan thought it was ridiculous enough that I should publish it anyways. :) I really do realize that they are suggestions and supposed to be helpful. :) I hope you got a laugh.


In other news, foot and ankle swelling has reared its cankley head the last couple of weeks. Have you seen Ever After? You know that part where Leonardo da Vinci is walking on the lake with his boat shoes?

Here's the clip if you haven't.  Start at 1:19

That's what I feel like sometimes. Including the whole falling over part. ;) Rest and elevation are good.


I have some wonderful news to finish off this silly post! Logan and I filed our taxes without pulling our hair out, killing each other in rage, or turning into terrorists. I know you weren't sure if peaceful tax-filing was still possible, but it is!


Remember, if you can pack for China, you can pack for the hospital. And waistbands are the devil.